Help me not feel guilty about a mostly outside dog...
Jan 9, 2017 17:31:54 GMT -5
trina b likes this
Post by wistfuldream on Jan 9, 2017 17:31:54 GMT -5
This will be long. I apologize in advance!
I have wanted a dog desperately since I was very little. A year ago that dream finally came true and we brought home Pippin - a miniature Australian shepherd. He's adorable. He's fantastic with the kids. He doesn't mess with the cats.
I'm just having a huge... disconnect?... with the fact that he's turned into more of an outside dog when we were specifically hoping for more of an inside "be with the family" dog. He clearly adores us (I'm 100% convinced that his world begins and ends with my not quite 2 year old daughter) and is utterly convinced that he is a lap dog (even though he's never been allowed on furniture etc....) He just can't turn "off" when inside.
The first two weeks we had him went about how I expected - he had a few accidents, I had a few (private) meltdowns, and he played happily with the kids until exhausted and then flopped over and went happily to sleep. Rinse, repeat.
About the time we'd had him for a month though - and got old enough that he didn't require a zillion hours of sleep per day - it became obvious that unless forced by sheer exhaustion he could not (would not?) come out of super-excited-play with me mode while inside. At first we thought this was an exercise issue (and honestly that might be part of it) so we upped walks, high intensity play sessions etc but it didn't help.
Since then we've more or less settled into a routine that has him sleeping inside at night and inside for an hour or two in the afternoon (we homeschool and have, unfortunately, found that we can't get school done if he's in the house, because even if he's crated he won't stop crying if he can see the kids/knows that they're there). At first DH and I thought that it might just be linked to the kids presence so we tried having him in for some one-on-one time with us after the kids were asleep but it's just the same insanity. It's not like he's wild it's more like despite being in the same place, with the same things, and the same noises every single day he reacts to them every single day like it is all a Brand New Frontier.
Honestly, coupled with our training "issues"* I've started wondering if he doesn't have some type of mental issue.
* Training issues = outside of training him to not go potty in his crate/the house and "sit" (when coupled with "hold" and then "eat" at meal times) he cannot remember/execute basic commands. He's smart and he gets them but it is like he resets every 6-8 weeks. Like one day he wakes up and looks at you like "I know I'm supposed to do something when you say that but...". At first I thought it was linked with decreasing/randomizing food rewards so I just went to rewarding him all the time but it still happens every 1.5-2 months like clockwork.
He's fed a good diet, gets decent exercise, fresh water, vet care etc so it's not like he's neglected but everyday I feel so sad when I look out and see him in his run (even when he's obviously ridiculously happy and playing or conning the kids into rubbing his belly) because of that disconnect between what I wanted and what I actually have.
I don't know what I'm looking for here... people to reassure me that mostly (or completely) outside dogs can still be happy, healthy, and have good lives? Suggestions for things that I might be overlooking? General commiseration from an audience that won't automatically label me "Bad Dog Parent" for not having the fur baby inside all the time? (No lie... it has made me feel slightly less like a failure just typing this out).
And picture, because if you're going to read all that you deserve some sort of reward (and he's a cute little snot and I do love him)...
I have wanted a dog desperately since I was very little. A year ago that dream finally came true and we brought home Pippin - a miniature Australian shepherd. He's adorable. He's fantastic with the kids. He doesn't mess with the cats.
I'm just having a huge... disconnect?... with the fact that he's turned into more of an outside dog when we were specifically hoping for more of an inside "be with the family" dog. He clearly adores us (I'm 100% convinced that his world begins and ends with my not quite 2 year old daughter) and is utterly convinced that he is a lap dog (even though he's never been allowed on furniture etc....) He just can't turn "off" when inside.
The first two weeks we had him went about how I expected - he had a few accidents, I had a few (private) meltdowns, and he played happily with the kids until exhausted and then flopped over and went happily to sleep. Rinse, repeat.
About the time we'd had him for a month though - and got old enough that he didn't require a zillion hours of sleep per day - it became obvious that unless forced by sheer exhaustion he could not (would not?) come out of super-excited-play with me mode while inside. At first we thought this was an exercise issue (and honestly that might be part of it) so we upped walks, high intensity play sessions etc but it didn't help.
Since then we've more or less settled into a routine that has him sleeping inside at night and inside for an hour or two in the afternoon (we homeschool and have, unfortunately, found that we can't get school done if he's in the house, because even if he's crated he won't stop crying if he can see the kids/knows that they're there). At first DH and I thought that it might just be linked to the kids presence so we tried having him in for some one-on-one time with us after the kids were asleep but it's just the same insanity. It's not like he's wild it's more like despite being in the same place, with the same things, and the same noises every single day he reacts to them every single day like it is all a Brand New Frontier.
Honestly, coupled with our training "issues"* I've started wondering if he doesn't have some type of mental issue.
* Training issues = outside of training him to not go potty in his crate/the house and "sit" (when coupled with "hold" and then "eat" at meal times) he cannot remember/execute basic commands. He's smart and he gets them but it is like he resets every 6-8 weeks. Like one day he wakes up and looks at you like "I know I'm supposed to do something when you say that but...". At first I thought it was linked with decreasing/randomizing food rewards so I just went to rewarding him all the time but it still happens every 1.5-2 months like clockwork.
He's fed a good diet, gets decent exercise, fresh water, vet care etc so it's not like he's neglected but everyday I feel so sad when I look out and see him in his run (even when he's obviously ridiculously happy and playing or conning the kids into rubbing his belly) because of that disconnect between what I wanted and what I actually have.
I don't know what I'm looking for here... people to reassure me that mostly (or completely) outside dogs can still be happy, healthy, and have good lives? Suggestions for things that I might be overlooking? General commiseration from an audience that won't automatically label me "Bad Dog Parent" for not having the fur baby inside all the time? (No lie... it has made me feel slightly less like a failure just typing this out).
And picture, because if you're going to read all that you deserve some sort of reward (and he's a cute little snot and I do love him)...